Friends, we are down to our last three lojong slogans! Can you believe it?

The 57th lojong slogan says, “Don’t be jealous.” But of course, everyone feels jealous sometimes. So Pema Chodron wisely adds, “Work with jealousy when it’s small, otherwise when it hits full force you’ll be swept away.” Jealousy has a way of becoming a monster.

Jealousy is a reaction of insecurity. When we see someone else do well and we resent them, it’s because we’re operating from a place of self-consciousness rather than self-awareness. In reality, their success likely has nothing to do with us. But we respond to it as if it is a personal attack. It’s good to step back and realize how utterly ridiculous this is.

The truth is, we don’t get to have everything go our way. And we don’t get to block others from having things go their way, either. Why would we?! Just because an arch-nemesis loses an award doesn’t mean we win it. But jealousy can sometimes fool us into feeling otherwise. But pettiness is a sign of a small soul. We are bigger and deeper than that.

Much of the jealousy mentality stems from a fear of lack. But the truth is, nobody has ever said, “I’ve experienced too many amazing books/poems/songs/new business ideas. I don’t have room for any more.” We can root for everyone. There’s enough appreciation to go around.

And on days when we feel appreciation is lacking, we can choose to be part of the solution by lifting others up. A rising tide lifts all boats, as they say. Which is why Norman Fischer suggests we practice sympathetic joy. It’s the opposite of jealousy. Whenever you see someone experience joy, join in. Be thrilled when a coworker gets a raise or promotion, or when that old friend publishes a book. Feel happy when someone gets married, or gets a kitten, or a fabulous new pair of shoes. Instead of resenting the joy, join it. Fischer says, “Not only will you feel jealousy less, but the precise occasions that in the past made you jealous will now make you happy.”

Talk about a turnaround!

Life’s too short. Don’t be jealous. Join in the joy you see around you, and see how that shifts your soul.