In the four practices, the third is commonly described as, “Feed your ghosts.” As a refresher, we’re still working with the fifteenth lojong slogan, “Four practices are the best of methods.” The first is accumulation of merit and the second is laying down evil deeds. In this third method, we find compassion for the times when we have irrational outbursts.

Another way of describing the third practice is “make an offering to the dons.” A don is a moment of extreme neurosis. Something hits your button and you just lose it. You go crazy. This isn’t like a small little frustration you have in the day. It’s an episode. A don makes a mark. In Tibetan tradition, when this happens, you offer little cakes to the ghosts who create these reactions in you. In a way, you say, “Thank you for giving me clarity through that dramatic episode.”

Norman Fischer translates this practice as appreciating your lunacy. He writes, “Truly it is a marvel, the extent to which we are selfish, confused, lazy, resentful, and so on. We come by these things honestly… So we make offerings to the demons inside us, we develop a sense of humorous appreciation for our own stupidity. We are in good company! We can laugh at ourselves and everyone else.”

The main thing I love about this idea is that it reminds you that when something within you acts out, it’s because of a longing. A need. It’s because something is missing. That doesn’t mean the way the ghost acted is good or helpful. But bless its heart, it’s not evil. It needs something. This sets us in a place of compassion.

Even our neurotic little outbursts can be a gift to us. We thank them. We laugh. And then we let them go.

How can you feed your ghosts this week?