Idle Chatter is the last of the four kinds of speech we want to avoid when practicing Right Speech. Which is hard, because so much of our day is made up of idle chatter. Think about your social media feed! People sharing what they had for lunch, a photo from their morning workout, some random comment about a lady in a grocery store. Social media has made idle chatter into a lauded form of communication. In the last decade, we’ve made idle chatter into an art form. And we praise those who “do it best” (whatever that means) by giving them lots of followers and a bigger platform from which to speak.

But is all of this really necessary?

Can we truly say this is helpful, or beneficial?

Bhante Gunaratana says, “All mindful speech motivated by love and compassion is an acceptable part of skillful speech.” So the kind of speech we want to aim for is mindful, compassionate, and skillful.

In contrast, we can define idle chatter as pointless talk. It lacks purpose and depth. Of course, we need some idle chatter to create and maintain social cohesion. At work events, or at parties or sports functions, you can’t just launch into a deep discussion. You talk about the weather, you ask if anyone’s seen a recent movie. While we can’t call this mindful speech, it’s the most benevolent kind of idle chatter. It’s fine, in small doses, as needed.

But take a moment to consider how much of your day- beyond social necessity- contains idle chatter.

There’s room to cut out some words, I’m guessing.

I find this humbling. For someone who actually greatly dislikes idle chatter and would much prefer a deep and thoughtful conversation about…anything, I still fill so much of my day with pointless talk. I fill it by scrolling through Twitter and Instagram. I don’t take time before speaking to measure whether my words are useful or just space fillers. And I wonder if a lot of this is tied to this huge cultural need to be “likable” or “relatable” (whatever that means). We may want to consider why, culturally, we’d rather hear someone tell a funny story than talk about something important.

Why do we value drama over discourse? Effusiveness over earnestness?

How can we talk so much in this society and say so little?

So, here’s how I’m going to practice Right Speech for the rest of the week and weekend. I’m going to stay off social media. I am going to practice being silent when I feel the need to fill space with unnecessary words. And in conversation with people, I’m going to try to move toward meaningfulness in a thoughtful but intentional way.

How can you cut back on the idle chatter in your life?

This post belongs to a series on the Eightfold Path. Read all my posts for Right Speech here.