Verse 15 encourages us to be thankful for our critic. It reads,
“Even if in the midst of a large gathering someone exposes my hidden faults with insulting language, to bow to him respectfully, regarding him as a spiritual friend, is the practice of a bodhisattva.”
While verse 15 continues the theme of being wronged by others, this time the words may indeed be true. Either way, nobody signs up for public humiliation. Imagine (or remember) how it feels when someone disparages you in front of your family and friends or colleagues. Your face turns red and hot. Shame abounds. And you may consider hitting back.
Don’t. Retaliation won’t give you a single thing, and it certainly won’t bolster your reputation. Dilgo Khyentse explains there are four principles of positive training:
- If someone abuses you, don’t abuse them in return.
- If someone gets angry with you, don’t get angry with them in return.
- If someone exposes your hidden faults, don’t expose theirs in return.
- If someone strikes you, don’t strike back.
When we think about it, all the great spiritual teachers (Jesus, the Buddha, Ghandi, the saints) share this wisdom. They do not return evil for evil, but return it with good instead.
The reason, however, that verse 15 encourages us to be grateful for our overly honest critic is because it points out where we have room to grow, and it reminds us how fleeting it is to chase image and status. Khyentse writes, “You are unlikely to make much spiritual progress if you lack the courage to face your own hidden faults.” And Thubten Chodron says, “This person who is deriding us in a public gathering is throwing us back on ourselves. Instead of seeking others’ approval in order to feel good about ourselves, he is teaching us that if our motivations are good, it doesn’t matter what other people think.”
How can you be thankful for your critic this week?
